The Girl and the Deer
By Riley
Once upon time here was a girl stuck in the woods. She was stuck in the woods because she liked to explore the woods because there was always something to do. But she didn’t expect to get lost in the woods. She thought she would never make it home. She thought she was stuck in the woods for ever. She sat down to sing a song her song blew with the wind and something amazing happened. The Deer liked the song and so the deer followed the voice. The deer went so fast . They got to the girl some
deer ate her dress and the deer lead her out of the woods to her home.She had a tiny home that she did not like. It had a tiny bathroom, a tiny bedroom and no living room. She wanted to live with the deer.She went to a tree to make her big decision. She made her big decision... she went to live with the DEER!
THE END.
So that's all for today bye everyone see you next time.
Hi RIley, you should be able to publish your Picture Book on our blog. If you come and see me in literacy time, we can have a look at how to do it! I love your story and the way that you have taken the time to go back and edit it.
ReplyDeleteKia ora Riley. I like the story idea, it was a very short one, and maybe you could get some help and turn it into a real picture book. To improve, you could put more commas in and check with someone if it makes sense.
ReplyDeleteBlog you later Riley.